Learning to Let Go, Learning to Trust
Before I had a child, I had always been focussed, purposeful, goal-driven. I invariably achieved most of what I had set out to…and yet, and perhaps it is meant to be so, in my parenting journey and subsequently in much of my life since, I have had to learn and re-learn the lessons of ‘letting go’ and ‘trusting’.
As any parent would tell you, it is impossible to insist and subsequently control the actions and outcomes of your child (or anyone else for that matter), regardless of how well intentioned those outcomes may be.
I say: “You need to be dressed and out of the door in five minutes.” I find, in five minutes, she’s lounging on her bed reading her book.
I say: “You need to know these number bonds.” She says, “Yes, I do know them.” “What’s 5+5?” She looks bored, disinterested, then pipes up “6?”
The list goes on, and I’m sure there isn’t a mother anywhere who has not had these experiences.
And so I’m learning…Learning to let go and trust, that all things will be well in their own time, because let’s be frank, I’ve done the stress, anger, threats, screams, bribes and while they may all work with varying results, ultimately I keep coming back to the fact that these wants, goals and desires are mine, not hers.
And so I’m reminding myself with
Conscious daily reminders
All I have to do today is let go and trust that all will be well.
If anything is going
wrong differently to how I expect it to be, then all the more important it is for me to let go and trust that things are exactly as they should be.
Each moment in itself is perfect and what I choose to do in each moment is all there is.
I’m letting go of future goals and projections, of long term gains and their associated actions in exchange for living right this minute, right now.
To celebrate in each moment the joy and happiness around me.
At least that’s the goal 😉 (I’m trying)
And I’m learning that inaction or no choice is in itself a choice.
And while I’m not completely comfortable with the ‘Let Go and Trust’ idea, at this point I can’t think of what else to do. Until I do, and I’ll definitely come back and tell you about it, ‘Let go and Trust’ will have to make do.
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Take care and be happy!
We make choices everyday, whether consciously or not. Have you ever thought about what your conscious choices are, everyday?
Why you still need to MAKE that Cake! | Be Happy HQ
November 7, 2013 @ 9:54 pm
[…] Learning to Let Go, Learning to Trust […]
November 14, 2013 @ 7:38 am
Funny post here Li-ling. especially when you command your daughter to do things and she does whatever she wants:)
Sounds like no one can help us let go and trust than kids, mainly because we don’t have a choice when it comes to them.
Kids are great people to learn from because they are so much in the moment. They don’t remember what happened yesterday and don’t care about tomorrow – they’re here now!
Like you talk about your cake post, I’ve found that I have to do my part but then let go and trust. When I have no control over the outcome at some point, positive vibes, prayer and trust are all I have left.
November 18, 2013 @ 11:42 am
Ahh…Vishnu, I take it you don’t have kids yet. They are both uniquely amazing and so exasperating at the same time.
The great lesson I keep learning is that she may be ‘of’ me, but she is so uniquely her own self.
I doubt that anyone can completely ‘let go’ when it comes to their own children. Parents remain parents for life, I think the lesson in ‘letting go’ means learning to keep our mouths shut and letting them get on with their own life journeys.